Sunday, May 25, 2008

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull: Review

Indy's back! But after this movie I think he should have stayed in retirement.
Now let's be honest, this was a pretty good movie. It's just that I am so sick of the Spielberg-Lucas duo that are reviving old movie favorites just to make a quick buck.
So Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is set 20 years after the events of The Last Crusade. Indy is retired and lecturing. But he gets drawn back into the tomb aiding business when Cate Blanchett and some Russians ask him for help to find this magnetized alien head from Area 51. Then Shia LaBeouf comes in and says that he needs Indy's help to find-- ah wtf the movie really made no sense. Pfft!
And you know, I'm getting really sick of Shia LaBeouf sticking his hiney into every Spielberg movie possible. What kind of blackmail thing does Shia have going on with Spielberg. Practically every movie Spielberg make has Shia starring in it. I almost ripped my eyes out at the end when they nearly hinted that Shia was going to be taking over the Indiana Jones franchise. Jesus Christ I genuinely nearly had a heart attack there in the cinema.
But for what it's forth, 20 years on and Harrison Ford's still got it. I loved him as Indiana Jones in the first 3 films and I love him here. He is the only character besides Marion that I enjoyed watching only cause it was some sort of nostalgic moment. What would have really sold the film if all the girls Indy has banged in the last two films like Kate Capshaw make a cameo. That would have been awesome.
Cate Blanchett with a bob.. she looked a hell lot like my aunty with that haircut you know. It was so friggin weird how much they resembled each other. And the lousy Russian accent didn't help.. not one bit.
The stunts and the stuff Indy does in this movie has finally cross that line between realistic and downright bullshit. In the movie we have Indiana Jones being shot up in a fridge 200,000 feet in the air by an atom bomb blast and he makes it out without a scratch. In the next movie I bet the guy's gonna find a paper plate on an airplane and air board off it. I think Spielberg was a little drunk when he was writing that part.
The second part of the film turns into this really big video game where it becomes more of the obstacles than really focusing on the characters. While it still retains that Indiana Jones adventure feel, I dunno.. it just wasn't the same feeling I had when I saw Raiders of the Lost Ark.
But there were some action sequences I really enjoyed. The big car chase scene through the jungle was phenomenal. But whats up with all these bad guys having lousy aim. I mean their practically spraying bullets at Indy and not a single one hits him. They must have went to the same scooting school with the Storm Troopers or something. Oh and I love that ant scene, that was uber awesomeness!
Indiana Jones 4 is a worthy addition to the franchise but it really wasn't necessary at all. Though I did enjoy it for the most parts, I swear if they make a 5th movie I will kidnap Spielberg and George Lucas and feed them to those ant things.

RATING: 6/10

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