Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Camp Rock: Review

Okay, so I'm typing the first part of the review before watching the actual movie as a bet with my sister to see if I can predict how the movie turns out.
So it's gonna be like High School Musical. Girl is unpopular and under priveledged. Girl is a brunette. Guy is popular, handsome and the object of Bitch's desire. Bitch is rich and blonde. Guy hears Girl singing an unfinished piece of the Song that will be sung at the end of the movie and falls in love. Bitch gets pissed. Bitch and sidekick makes Girl's life hell. Guy and Girl grow closer together. Bitch lets out a 'disasterous' secret about Girl and Guy breaks up with her. Girl cries. Bitch is happy. Sidekick not happy with Bitch. Sidekick leaves Bitch and joins Girl. Girl makes comeback on some concert-like event and sings the Song. Guy forsakes all stereotypes and his usual entourage to sing with Girl as the camera circles around them. Everyone loves Girl again and Bitch cries. I will feel sorry for Bitch. Guy and Girl almost kiss but it's Disney so... Girl forgives Bitch and everyone are friends again. Everyone sing another song which will soon be the anthem of Camp Rock, thus spawning Disney Asia My School Camp Rocks! Dance Competitions. Now I'll go watch the movie.

Now here's the full review:
Am I not great? Huh? Whatever I said in the first part, totally acurate. Everything High School Musical was and you know what? This was far worse. The only person singing were the Jonas Brothers. The others were lip synching and the worst part was it was obvious.
So Camp Rock is about a girl who desperately wants to spend time in a prestigious summer rock camp which is currently being coached by a rock star being played by Joe Jonas. And the rest of the story? You know how it goes.
What the hell happened to Disney? Seems like the only good thing to come out of that studio these days are Pixar movies. They tried way to hard to sell you another recycled High School Musical and it might work if you are one of two things.
1) stupid or-
2) 7 years old
The whole movie was laughable and embarrassing, glorifying the same ol' Disney formula. With a bit of exploitation I might add. The only reason most girls would watch this was for Joe Jonas and man he had my sis at the edge of her seat the whole time. I reckon he had about 5 scenes were he was just sitting by the lake in his T and knickers as a silent "Don't change that channel girls, I might go SWIMMING" excuse and my sis was like "COME ON TAKE IT OFF BABY!!" I don't know if it's only me, but aren't you guys just sick of the Jonas Brothers?
I mean, it's not like their not good and all. Matter of fact I actually like their music. Buts it's like their all over the place for reasons other than music. Their in TV shows, endorsements, ads, movies, one may wonder how serious they really are about their music. And it's all going so fast for them that I can actually see them getting screwed up someday. And when that does happen, Disney is gonna drop them like they were nothing.
 One last thing that really bothered me about the movie was the main song they used. You know, like for HSM it was Breaking Free and for this it was a song called "This Is Me". Disney better pray Michelle Branch don't ever watch Camp Rock because This Is Me was an exact copy of Everywhere. The lyrics were different but the chord progression, intro and chorus were exactly the same. There wasn't even an attempt to disguise the rip off. It's either they got an approval from Ms. Branch or their gonna be getting a lawsuit very soon.

RATING: 4/10 (Say what? HSM3 is coming out? Yaaaaay)

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